30 fingers&toes

"Are they triplets?" "No, I found the other one in the parking lot and thought, 'why not?'"

Dear Aidan

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This post was is from Thursday, October 18th. For some reason or another I could not get it to publish. Perhaps it didn’t like the swearing!!

FYI There are going to be swear words in this one…..

I have to write about today. I want to remember this day, so I can tell Aidan all about it sometime. And how better to remember this day then to put it out into the blog world.

Today started off as most days do. 7:15 the alarm goes off, but I’ve already been awake for the last 3 minutes because I like to torture myself by waking 3 minutes before my alarm!! Today Isabelle greeted me before my feet hit the floor. She cheerfully said good morning mommy! I had a great sleep last night! She then bounces out of the room cheerfully. I get out of bed and start towards my bathroom, when Madeline comes ripping past and pushes me out of her way and runs into my bathroom. So much for that idea.

I go and try to wake Aidan. He’s a little sleepy this morning because he decided to stay up late last night. Not something Aidan usually does. So it took a few times of telling him to get out of bed and he finally did. Getting dressed and breakfast went well so we’ll skip that part. Off to school we went. I now take the twins in the stroller due to walking to school issues we seem to have. They are happy to be in it, and I’m happy to not have to drag a child or two down the street screaming. We all win! We drop Isabelle off at school and return home. The twins played, while I decided to get a head start on cleaning up for the showing we were having at 3pm. Whilst cleaning, I get a call for another showing that will be at 1pm. I don’t want to turn down showings and since we already have to be out, why not right! Skip ahead to lunch time, we’ve picked up Isabelle, kids are eating lunch and I’m cleaning up that last few things.

Get the kids in the van and drive to this new park we have been going to that they seem to really enjoy. We weren’t there twenty minutes and Aidan tells me he has to poop. I was grumpy. The girls were grumpy. I made sure before we left that everyone went to the bathroom. Gave them plenty of time to do this, asked twice, asked if anyone needed to go even right before we left. So I pack the kids into the van, drive across the street to the Starbucks, unload the kids, take Aidan and the girls into the bathroom. Get Aidan on the toilet and he says he can’t poop. Aidan has a slight fear of public washrooms. Especially the kind with the auto-flushing. That scares the *%&! literally right out of him, however today it did not.

We leave Starbucks. Get out to car, it’s now raining. Kill time and drive to a Tim’s to pick up some timbits and a coffee for me. It’s now 1:45pm. I decide to swing by the house to see if the showing is over and if so, here’s a chance for Aidan to try and go to the bathroom worry free. So we get home and the lights are off inside which tells me the showing has ended. Unload Aidan, tell the girls to hang tight, go inside and Aidan sits down………….minutes go by…………grunting……….”There’s no poop Mommy.” His exact quote. I asked him if he was sure and said maybe try a few more minutes…..more minutes……more grunting…..Nothing. Pants up, lock door, back into van. Distribute Timbits. Go back to park as it is now sunny and warm again. Arrive at park. Park van. Kids run happily towards playground.

We play on the swings, we go down slides, sit on the spinney thing that will make a toddler fall off as we nearly discovered a previous time. Go down the slides a few more times and then it happens.

“I have to go poop Mommy!”

My first sentence, which was said inside my head was…..”WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE NO BATHROOMS AT THIS MOTHER FING PARK!!!

My second thought was, people let their dogs shit on the ground and then they pick it up in a baggie. I’m sure I have a plastic bag in the van. Would it be wrong to take Aidan over to a nice grassy spot and let him squat and dump so long as I pick it up? Probably.

Next, I tell the girls again that we have to leave because of Aidan’s bowels. They were not happy. Madeline even yelled at Aidan that she was mad we had to leave because he had to poop.

The time now is 2:24pm. I load the kids back into the van, race home in hopes to get Aidan to poop before next showing. We get home, get Aidan in the house, and on the throne. He tells me there is no poop. I decided that we were going to stay home right until 3pm if we had to because he was GOING TO POOP!! I go and get the girls out of the van. Madeline is super pissed off at this point because she figures we are not going back to the park. And she was right. If he didn’t poop while we were home, we were not going anywhere that did not have a bathroom. 3:54pm, still no poop. I even tried to get him to run around the backyard, but he was to upset with the whole thing.

Back into the van because people will show up soon. Drive around aimlessly trying to decide where to go. Decide on Dollerama. Arrive, in parking lot, about to get out of car when mini hurricane hits. Winds, rain, just a mess. So we drive around in parking lot of all the stores until the rain dies down enough that we can actually get out without getting soaked. We shop. Turns out Isabelle is scared of the Halloween aisle of the dollar store. She did not care for the fake severed arms and legs etc. So we finished up there, got back into van and it started to pour again. Now the kids are thirsty, we hit up a drive though and get a drink. Drive around until it’s time to go home.

Arrive home 4pm. Get in house, shoes, jackets, socks off. Kids running from living room to kitchen chasing each other. 4:15 Aidan goes to bathroom and has a monumental poop.

Thanks Aidan for making this afternoon absolutely pooptastic!

Dear Town of Milton,

Thank you for making sure you built a lot of parks here since most of the residents have only patches of grass for a backyard. As of mother of 3 small children who love to frequent your parks I have a simple request. Please install some restrooms! As I mentioned, I have 3 young children who just barely have a grasp on their bodily functions. We really enjoy your parks, however I seriously contemplated letting my 3 year old squat near a bush and poop! I would have picked it up in a baggy and thrown it out as dog owners usually do. However I did not want to teach my children that it is okay to poop outdoors in public areas. My son would also like to request that when you do supply some restrooms at your larger parks, please refrain from installing the auto flush toilets.

Sincerely,

The mom who didn’t let her kid poop on the grass at the park even though she really wanted to.

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Author: 30fingersandtoes

Parenting and adulting is hard. There is no manual. No volume control. No self cleaning house and self refilling fridge. This is my story of navigating through the ups and downs of our crazy-wonderful life.

One thought on “Dear Aidan

  1. ahahahha Thank god I still live in the north where letting your kids poop in the bushes is completely acceptable!

    Like

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